You can’t have your cake and eat it too…, and you should never voluntarily take a piece of an HOA’s cake. For, that cake comes with a price—a blood price—that will bind you to their covenants and leave you vulnerable to petty powertrips from their bored aged board members who will go to any lengths to ensure that not a single blade of grass is out of line.
About 10 years ago, this guy and his wife moved into a suburban neighborhood that had a community pool, which was only accessible to members of the homeowner’s association (HOA). But, when they tried to join, they were told that the HOA was not accepting new members, with the couple getting vibes from the HOA that they considered themselves to be too elite for the couple.
Several years later, the guy and his wife decided to put in a raised bed garden in their front yard—but someone kept reporting them to the city inspector. The inspector would repeatedly appear after continued mysterious reports, each time confirming that the garden was, in fact, legal—but still continuing to come anyways.
Growing frustrated by this harassment, the author filed a Freedom of Information Act request to find out who was behind the reports, hearing nothing back but putting an end to the visits from the city. Instead, they received a call from an anonymous older woman, who told them to remove the garden because it was against HOA rules. Realizing that the caller was the same HOA Karen who had rejected their offer to pay for an HOA membership, the couple declined to remove the garden, instead expanding it and even adding playhouses for their children to it. The HOA Karen, unable to do anything about this, undoubtedly continues to stew in her impotent wrath.
